


Midnight

by kayethespade



Series: The Midnight Trilogy [2]
Category: Homestuck
Genre: Character Death, Cussing, F/F, F/M, Gun Violence, M/M, Mafiastuck, Midnight Crewstuck, Minor Character Death, minor fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-02
Updated: 2016-08-02
Packaged: 2018-07-28 23:46:33
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 4
Words: 8,156
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7661884
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kayethespade/pseuds/kayethespade
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Here lies the middle meat of the Midnight Trilogy. Many mafia shenanigans are guaranteed. Do with that what you will. Read the tags for possible triggers.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. "Did I do anything I'll regret?"

I remember ordering a vodka cranberry, but after that, it's mostly bits and pieces of memories. I was currently laid up in bed back at my house, possibly not my house, with a horrible hangover. The past day and a half were either something I would regret once I came to my senses or something I would repeat soon after. Either way, an ice pack on my back and a new set of stitches over my eye alerted me to how injured the time left me.  
The door opened, and I made a half-way attempt to reach for my black jack on the bedside table, the gun tarnished with concrete dust and stained with blood. In the doorway stood Dave Strider, the time-traveling private investigator. I preferred not to meddle with time, but his abilities were interesting to say the least. One piece of memory flashed by in passing.  
Dave stood in the bar beside me as I finished my drink, but both of us were off the clock by that time.

"Mornin, doll face." he greeted, setting a breakfast tray across my lap. The light outside told me the time was closer to noon, but I never complain about breakfast for lunch.

"As much as I love seeing those ironic shades, what are you doing in my house?" I asked with an intrigued tone.

“This is my house. How much did you drink last night, Harley?"

"I had a half dozen beers plus a few fruity vodka drinks. Nice place you got here, by the way." I answered without batting an eye.

Dave sat down on the edge of the bed. "You met up with an old friend, and now you have one eye."

"Some party last night, huh?" I muttered, a smirk creeping onto my face. "Also, you'll have to specify which “friend", doll face."

He laughed a bit, his shades sliding down his nose. I tried to catch a peek at his eyes, but he pushed them up.  
"Ampora." Dave sighed, taking a piece of my toast. I mean technically the toast still belonged to him, but he gave it to me.

"That explains the eye and the hangover. Did I do anything I'll regret?" I muttered.

"Eridan's in bed rest for six months." he chuckled.

"Let me say that again. Did I do anything I'll actually regret?" I spat back. Dave's smile faded. He started to put on that cool guy mask again. No thoughts came as to why I wanted him to open up again. I just..did for some reason.  
"Oh gosh. Did we do the do last night? Cause not that you're not good-looking, but I’m hoping to God that being tipsy isn’t your turn on." I growled, holding my forehead. There was that smile again. If I was standing, I'd probably have gone weak in the knees.

“No. I wouldn't do that, Jade. I'm a gentleman, remember?" Dave answered, rubbing the place where my knee was under the covers. The way he said my name made me have to suppress a shudder. That leg rub was totally platonic, right?

I glared challengingly. "Always proper, huh?" He nodded. "What a shame."

Dave laughed, standing and leaning down to kiss my forehead. "Eat, Harley." he suggested, heading out the way he came.

My smirk flipped into a genuine smile before I caught myself. I had better things to worry about than who was taking care of me. Even if his presence made me want to melt into him or completely melt through the floor.

“Wow I’m going soft,” I thought with a grimace.  
What all happened last night? There wasn't any discomfort aside from the obvious. No bleeding from strange places. No obscene bruising. Well, two on my hip bones, but that was from about a month ago. I stretched, popping my back with a sigh.

After examining my food for anything malicious, I dug into the eggs and bacon. Strider knows how to use a frying pan. I finished in short order and decided to start heading out. Staying here for any longer sparks suspicion, and worried cohorts start getting antsy. When I stood from my bed, pain shot up my body. Pain being my constant companion, I customarily moved on. This pain prickled through me and started to burn. I crumpled to the ground, but Dave caught me.

“Goddammit, Harley. Can’t keep a bad dog down, can ya?” He slipped into his Texan accent. God damn that Texan accent.

I closed my eyes to gather my bearings again. He set me back on the edge of the bed. “What the hell was that, Strider?” I grumbled in annoyance.

“The Amporas got a new poison. Courtesy of Her Imperious Condescension.” he answered, brushing my hair behind my ear.  
“HIC? I thought she was working for Lord English."  
“She’s been splitting off to accomplish her own goals, and the Amporas saw a big bad to grovel under. They jumped at the chance to be her goons.” Dave sighed, putting a new ice pack on my back.  
“Hah. Typical. Why’d she want me out of the way?"  
“She probably figured that since you’re so dead set on offing Lord English that you’d interfere with whatever her plans are, and she’s willing to exploit off hours to make sure you stay down.”  
“I catch your meaning. Why’d you save my ass then? It’d have saved you a lot of trouble for your clients if I were permanently incapacitated."  
“Call it a personal obligation."  
“Can’t stand to see a woman getting hurt?” I teased.  
“Let’s just say that in a different life, we were much better friends.” he corrected.

A stretch of silence ensued as I contemplated this. I confirmed that parallel universes and alternate timelines existed while I fought Mama Megido back in the day. Did him saving me mean that we were just really good friends in another timeline? Or were we…something a bit more intimate?

“So? What now?” I sighed, adjusting my glasses.  
“I called Doctor Lalonde and Investigator Crocker. After we get you back up and running, we’re gonna take down that Batterbitch."  
“Am I gonna need to call my team? They can be a bit unpredictable at times, but they cover all my bases.”  
“Sorry, Harley. They’re too much of a liability.”  
I muttered in resignation. Who would tell Egbert, English, and Vantas what happened to me if this went south? Would it be Dave? They would likely assume it was him. Dead on sight.  
“If it helps, I’ll cover your blindspot.” he added, sticking his tongue out teasingly. I giggled.

“Aww, you two are too cute!” a familiar Jersey accent remarked from the doorway. I jumped away from Dave.  
“Oh screw you, ‘londe. You gonna come fix my up or not?” I snapped, but my laugh betrayed me. Lalonde and I enjoyed quite a few fun times together, both in and outside her doctor’s office.

She swayed her way over to me, leaning over me to give me a peck on the lips. I grinned, but rolled my eyes at her copping a feel. Over her shoulder, I noticed a clearly bothered Investigator Crocker. I heard through the grapevine that they started dating, so I guess that gesture was going to lead to a heated discussion later. Hey. Not my problem.  
“I’ve got anti-venom, Jadey!”  
“Thank the Lord and all the angels and probably Buddha! Get it in me.”  
Dave chuckled a bit at my awkward wording.  
“If you insist, baby."

Lalonde grabbed a syringe from her medicine bag and my arm. I closed my eyes, silently holding my breath with a tense expression. The silence stayed.

“What is she doing?” Jane asked with incredulity.  
“Janey, darling, she has something of an ‘aversion’ to needles,” Roxy sighed.  
“Wow. Badass mob boss Jade Harley is afraid of needles?” Dave asked, appearing at my other side and holding my hand. I could have died. Right there.  
“Someone just shoot me now.” I growled, cracking open my eyes to glance over at Dave.

To my surprise, he shielded our heads with a blanket, and he took off his shades. I fixated on his bright red eyes, a similar bright red flushing my cheeks. He always had another surprise didn’t he. Even better, Dave was smiling at me. I struggled for words for a few seconds.  
“Okay, Dave. She did it. It’s done.” Jane interrupted.  
He put his shades back on and tossed off the blanket. And now there was a neon pink kitty bandage on my arm.  
“Well that worked.” I muttered, hoping to God that my blush subsided soon.  
“It’s the power of the eyes. They’re blessed with Eldritchian magical bullshit.” Dave spouted with a smirk. I punched his arm good-naturedly, but he winced.

“So. We have a location?” I asked, moving to stand. Roxy helped me out of bed. While the anti-venom was hardly fast-acting, at least I could stand with only the normal amount of pain.  
“Her Imperious Condescension acquired a home base at Ampora Senior's Casino. Our goal is to get the civilians out and kill her henchmen.” Jane answered.  
“It would be easier and far less costly to bring the whole place down and shoot whatever’s left in the rubble.” I grumbled.  
“Well, Harley, we can’t do that if we’re gonna avoid punishment."  
“I thought you guys wanted me along because we can’t force them into their graves inside the law.”  
“Yes, but further casualties will put more red on Dave’s and my ledger and we don’t want that.” she hissed.  
“Understandable. Except you have life powers. Couldn’t you just bring the civilians back to life?”  
“I don’t want it to come to that. We can’t always tell who’s civilian and who’s hostile."  
“Then why would you want to let the “civilians" escape when you don’t know who’s going to attack? Letting them go gives those who are really bad guys the chance to attack us from behind. What would be even better would be to sneak in and take out the henchmen plus HIC in the back of the casino. Whoever gets killed gets killed in a cause that’s worth it.”

More silence.  
“Jade’s right, Jane.” Dave sighed. “If we turn this into an all out brawl, the civilians will just get in the way. Besides, we’re going to need everything we’ve got to take out HIC."  
Jane scoffed, but she nodded in agreement. “Since you’re the one with all the ideas, how are we going to get in, Jade?"  
“Ampora Senior has quite the sick fetish of me. That’s actually how I got into mob work, but that’s a story for another time. Point is he has a soft spot. Dave and Jane: you two deliver me and it’ll go complete shit-show from there. Lalonde: you come in as a doctor. I’m sure you can convince the guards blocking HIC’s chambers that you’re there on a personal matter.”  
“Naturally,” Roxy breathed, reapplying her already shiny lip gloss.  
“Wait! You want Roxy to go in front of HIC alone?” Jane protested, anger surging through her. How dare I put her girlfriend in dang-I already don’t care.  
“Dualscar will never believe that either of you could take me down alone. If it makes you feel any better, once you get me in, you can go back up Lalonde. I’ll be there in five minutes. Flat.”

Dave jokingly clapped a little bit. “Alright, Harley. I hope you know what you’re getting yourself into.”  
“Of course I do, Strider. Now where’s my jack-…Dave.” A realization.  
“Yeah, Jade?"  
“How did I get into a nightgown?” Mounting frustration.  
“I..uh…..”  
“Dave."  
“Y-Yes?"  
“You got me naked to patch me up, didn’t you?”  
Silence…And then me laughing my ass off.  
“Oh this is just rich. If you’re a gentleman, then I’m a fucking lady! Now give me my clothes before I change my mind about not killing you.” I exclaimed, still giggling. It might’ve been the tears coming to my eyes, but I thought I saw Dave smile before he grabbed my clothes from the closet.


	2. “You conveniently left out why you have this death wish.”

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The raiding of a casino happens, as do some feelsy things.

We rode in Roxy’s care to Dualscar’s Casino. Lalonde drove. Crocker rode shotgun. Dave and I took the backseat. The driver’s partition was up. So much familiarity.  
“Jade?” Dave nonchalantly asked. I nodded for him to continue.

“How did you get into the mob?”  
Okay so I swore I would never tell anyone except my team this story, but Dave and I were kindergarten buddies. I felt like that kind of history took precedence.

“You know how I fell off the face of the Earth after junior high.” He nodded.

“The people who killed my grandpa kidnapped me. I managed to escape, but I was a little girl lost in a big city with no way to get home. While they had me in captivity, I learned that I’m the third generation of a major mafia. I didn’t know what to do, but I thought that if I came back, everybody would find out and start to bully me. I already had buck teeth and a dorky laugh and kinda gay tendencies, so I couldn’t take something that would make it even worse. I don’t know how, but I ended up in the Red Light District. A group of prosti-sex workers took me in. I was so fascinated with their dancing and how they made people love them. Again. Gay tendencies. I knew they couldn’t support me forever, so I asked if I could start earning my keep. They took a vote, and it was unanimous that they wanted to teach me."

I paused to smile a little bit at the memories. Nepeta. Vriska. Aradia. Feferi. Kanaya. They raised me.

“And so they did. I became the best actress in Red Light, and I caught the attention of Dualscar Ampora when I was about eighteen. He took a liking to me. He ordered me with a side of submission every time he came in. I mean hey, he tipped generously. We got to talking sometimes. He said he needed a special escort for a job he was doing. I agreed for the extra money. "A woman in a party of men is a token of peace" bullshit. I came along to a quiet raid of the Makara Mansion. They didn’t stop shooting just because I was there, so I picked up a rifle and aimed for the throat. Dualscar was surprised and very impressed. I kept going on more and more “jobs", getting some of my own. I found my long-lost brother, a cousin of mine under the mocking surname English, and their fight-happy friend. We started working together sometimes. Eventually, I grew too powerful to stay between Dualscar’s knees, so he tried to kill me. I broke his arm and got away, ensuring him that he would never hurt me again. I knew it was way too late to turn back to my old life, so I kept moving forward. Sometimes I worked crooked, sometimes I didn’t. I bought an apartment, then a house with my friends. Lalonde and her sister worked as an underground doctor/therapist pair, so that’s how I know them. Then you started getting in my way last year, a terrible idea I might add. Then your brother. Then Crocker. And the rest is history."

“Quite the story, Harley. Maybe after this is done we can work on cleaning your name.” Dave suggested, taking my hand. I drew it back with a snarl.

“Do you even know me? I won’t stop until English is dead, and I’m doing it my way.”

“You conveniently left out why you have this death wish, Jade.”

“I don’t want to talk about it."

“Please. Tell me."

“He killed my grandpa. He ordered me kidnapped with a side of beaten and bloodied. He killed John’s and Jake’s and Karkat’s parents. He pours millions of dollars into keeping drugs in the Red Light District lucrative. One of my friends died of heroine overdose that wouldn’t have happened if he weren’t subsidizing that industry. He will pay with his life, or I will die trying.”

Terezi. She got in too deep seeking justice for her sister’s death, and she died too.

“I’m sorry.”

I looked up at him and saw tears slipping out from underneath his shades. I held his hand as tight as I could.

“I’ll fight him with you.” he whispered.

~~~~~~~

They dragged me in through the back entrance. The security guards saw my face, shaking and beaten. I seemed stricken with pain in each lazy step that I took. I put up a struggle, my hands tied behind my back. I saw Dualscar at the head of a long dinner table just before Jane threw me to the ground. I cried out in agony, rolling myself up to my knees slowly.

“Call it a gift.” Jane said with a sickeningly sweet tone. Whatever happened above me, I was too busy keeping my act up.

“Leave us.” Dualscar ordered to Dave, Jane, his guards, and his dinner guests. They all exited.

“Awww, did my lost puppy get hurt?” he asked, tilting my chin up with his calloused hands.

“P-please! I-I don’t know what that poison did to me. I feel like I’m going to die.” I begged, inwardly cringing as he feels me up through my jacket. Not only because my boobs are there but because my weapons are a little bit lower.

“I knew you’d come crawling back, and as long as I keep you out of the way of Her Imperious Condescension, you get to live as my pet.” Dualscar exposited aloud.

“R-really? You’ll heal me after everything I’ve done?” I whimpered pathetically. His other hand worked its way up my thigh. I slipped out of the ropes and grabbed the pistols strapped to my back.

“Absolu-oof!“ I kicked straight to his gut, my heel digging in maliciously. I aimed my pistols and fired. One caught his left earfin, another in his leg, and another in his arm. He reached Ahab’s Crosshairs, firing a beam straight through the wall behind me. Good thing I ducked.

Dualscar roared in pain and frustration. I aimed straight for his open maw. He knelt before me. “Au revoir, bitch,” I muttered, putting him out of his misery. Cronus went down soon after. I would probably finish my business with the youngest later. The elder had a final request.

“Tell Kankri I’m sorry.” Kankri? He was Karkat’s older brother, but he showed up missing a couple years before I met Karkles. Sigh.

"Guess you won’t get any more out of those violet corpses."

I froze, turning around to see none other than the Batterbitch herself. At her feet laid Dave, Jane, and Roxy. I steeled myself with determination. If she dared to hurt them, Dave had no idea how much pink I’d have on my ledger. This ended today.

“Okay, bitch, let me make you a deal. You walk away. You don’t meddle in my work or any of Lord English’s tricks again. You get to go on living your sad little existence. Capiche?” she offered.

“And what happens to my three constituents?” I quipped.

“Imma say sex trade. Tho I might keep the red-eyed one for fun. Looks like his sweet ass would do nicely by my throne.” HIC pondered.

“You know what? Fine, Condy. I’ll take your terms. What have these PIs ever done for me? I mean, the nurse is alright. She’s a pretty good fuck, but she’s double crossed me to cross back more times than I can count. So why not just let them get fucked?"

“Exact-ck-ly. Fuck.”

I ran my mouth long enough for Roxy to use her void powers to stab HIC in the back. Dave would be so proud. I nodded to her with a grin. I walked over to HIC's fallen body, cocking one of my pistols.

“Night night.” Bang.

I knelt down next to Dave, shaking his shoulders. “Wake up! Now. Goddammit, Dave. Please. Please wake up.” I smacked him, trying to get him to open those eyes again.

“Never thought I’d see Jade Harley cry.” came a voice from the doorway of the room. There stood Dave.

“…Time shenanigans?” I blubbered.  
“Time shenanigans.” he confirmed.

I ran and jump hugged him, clinging to him and giggling. “We took down the Condesce!” And then I heard the boots and guns of security.

“Oooooh shit. Guys we can hug later. Time to giddafuck out!” Roxy yelled, grabbing Jane by the hand and heading for the exit. I swooped up my dropped pistol, then Dave’s hand, running after them. We hopped into the car, bullets peppering our tail as we sped away.

Dave and I breathed heavily, then looked at each other and just grinned like drunken idiots.

“I, uh, I can see why you like that.” he sighed.  
“Hah. Didn’t say I liked it, but the adrenaline high afterwards sure makes me forget my worries.” I replied, shaking his hand in congratulations.  
“You want to just go back to your place? Your team is probably worried to hell about you.” Dave asked.  
“Yeah. They’ve probably gone on a mad dash around the entire city looking for me.”  
“Alright, folks. One mobster’s house it is.” Roxy answered from the front.

I casually clung onto Dave’s arm the whole ride home. He didn’t seem to mind. He reached forwards with his other hand to put the partition up, kissed my forehead.

“God, Harley. You sure are something. That was a pretty fuckin sweet spiel you went into to distract HIC.” he remarked.  
“Just for your peace of mind, none of it was true.” I muttered.  
“Thanks, but that was pretty much a given.” Damn that fucking Texan accent.  
“Though, if I’m going to be honest…” I began.  
“Jade?"  
“You do have a pretty sweet ass."  
Beat.  
“Ex-fucking-cuse you, Harley. I have the sweetest ass in all of Paradox Space besides maybe yours."

I tried to suppress a blush, but it came on too strong. “God you’re such an ass.”  
“And you love it.” Dave added.  
“You fucking wish.”  
“Admit it. You were so scared that I was gonna die."  
“Oh fuck you of course I was. Not seeing you again just might be the suckiest thing to ever suck.” I yelled.  
He leaned down to kissed my cheek, but I turned my head and we kissed. And I stayed. And he stayed. And I could have melted into him if we hadn’t just arrived at my house. I pulled away and got out of the car.  
“Hey Dave."  
“Y-Yeah, Harley?"  
“Call me sometime.”  
The car door slammed.

~~~~~~~

I walked through the door to tackle hugs from my three cohorts. When they simultaneously said my name, John and Jake both sounded overwhelmingly excited, while Karkat, per usual, sounded angry.  
“Where were you, goddammit? And why do you have one eye?” Karkat asked.  
“Boy do I have a story for you guys. It’s a bit of a long one. I was off the clock getting a drink, you know like you do, and I got attacked by Eridan Ampora while leaving the bar. Lost my eye. Get this, Dave Strider saved my ass, got me naked to patch me up, and called in Roxy and Jane. The Amporas got a new poison from HIC, their new boss splitting off from Lord English. Really screwed me up, but Roxy got some anti-venom in me. I agreed to help these goodie-two-shoes kill the Amporas and their boss lady. Got the job done. Some feelings things happened, and now I’m in a bit of a flirtationship with the younger Strider.” I spouted off quickly, making my way to the kitchen to get myself a light drink.

“Oh my god are you hurt? I mean besides the eye. But really that just makes you look even more intimidating,” Jake piped up.  
“No, guys. I’m fine, but I told Dave my story.”  
Silence.  
“Wow. You really think he’s the guy from grade school back in Kansas?” John asked, pushing up to sit on the bar.  
“Yeah. I think he is, but for now I’m going to bed. It’s almost sunrise and it’s been a long day.”

~~~~~~~

I walked through the door of my apartment to find Dirk cooking stir fry for dinner.

“Where you been, Dave?” he asked.  
“Oh you know. Saved Harley. Raided a casino. Roxy killed HIC. Got to patch Harley up and kiss her all in the same night."  
“Very nicely done. You get to say hi to Jake like I told you to?”  
“Nah. Was too dumbstruck about Jade to ask if I could come in."  
“Aww, so cute. You found yourself a girlfwiend"  
“Hah. Shut up. She just told me to call her sometime. ” I laughed, taking a seat at the bar.

I started eating my dinner, still daydreaming about the beautiful perfection that is Jade Harley. I’d gotten to know her again over our team-ups the past few months. It was so nice to see her again, even if she’d gotten a little rough around the edges. Still. I could see shining portions of her that were just like she used to be. Regardless of who she was, it looks like I fell hard for who she became.

“Did you find out her whole story?” Dirk asked, tugging me back to reality.  
“Yeah. Why do you ask?”  
“You just look like you learned a lot more about her tonight."  
“I…don’t know how to respond to that."  
“What I mean is..do you really think that she’s the girl from grade school?”  
“Yeah. I know I’ve found her. And I’m not gonna lose her again.”  
“She’s not the same, is she.” It was more a statement than a question.  
“So what? I’m not the same as I was then either, bro.” I replied.  
“I just want you to be careful, okay? Sometimes meeting people from our past doesn’t go as well as we’d hope."  
“What, like Jake?”  
His jaw tightens, hands holding his fork a few inches from his plate.  
“Dirk. It’s been six months, and you two dated for three years. He might have forgiven you by now.” I push on.  
“I know, Dave. I just, don’t want to hurt him again, I guess.”  
“Hey.” He looks up at me. “If you try again and it doesn’t work out, life goes on. Jake English does not comprise the entire goddamn universe.”  
“Dave?"  
“Yeah?"  
“Thanks."  
“No problem, man. We are in the shit together.”


	3. "I fucking shaved for this."

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A JadeDave date happens and is followed directly by plot-heavy things. Gratuitous violence ahead.

Getting back to work the next night really took a toll. Went through hell and back to extract the exact location of Lord English’s new hideout. After this is done, it’ll all be worth it. I went to work each night and came back to bed exhausted, but I always texted with Dave for a few minutes before I slipped into slumber.

About a month after the HIC raid, just as I collapsed onto my bed, I glanced at my phone.

“TG: Hey. You wanna go out to dinner at MJ’s Pizza before you go to work tonight?” I smiled to myself, blinking my eyes to keep myself awake long enough to text him back.  
“GG: How about just tea or something? There’s an Onyx pretty close to MJ’s. Besides, that would be too heavy before work, sweety.” The response is immediate.  
“TG: Sounds awesome. See you tonight."  
“GG: <3"  
I didn’t read his response when he texted back. However, when I woke up, I saw another tiny “<3” on my screen. For the first time in an extremely long time, I had to decide what to wear.

"As long as I get out of the date by 7:30, I can come back to my house to change into work clothes to be out of the house by 8:30," I thought out loud, looking through my clothes. I didn’t have a lot of clothes that weren’t black, but I did have a couple sundresses equipped with weapon holders just in case I would have been attacked on my off hours or the weekend. I picked a flowy mint green dress that ended just above my knees and a pair of light brown boots. Per my routine, I weaponed up to my eyeballs to avoid being caught unawares. I glanced in the mirror one more time, fixing my hair worriedly.

“Jade, you look fine.” John remarked from my doorway. I rolled my eyes, but smiled back.

“I fucking shaved for this. He better not be late or I’m going to kill him.”

“Such a delightful way to start a date, Jade. Impeccable decision!” Jake yelled over his shoulder as he carried a dark load of laundry to the washer. Wait. They would have to do a light load this week.

“If he doesn’t respect you, you know what to do.” Karkat interjected with a grin. I nodded, grabbing my purse and heading for the door.

“Thanks for the votes of confidence, you guys. Wish me luck!”

~~~~~~~

I walked up to Onyx at the same time that Dave got out of his car. We walked to each other, hugging when we arrived. I felt his flushing cheek against my shoulder.  
"This nerd. So sweet he’s gonna give me diabetes,” I thought.

“Okay I’m gonna be upfront about this: I have no idea how to date. People just magically want to do the do with me before they even know who I am or what I stand for, so this is my first really truly seriously official date in what can be qualified as a long-ass time.” I began as we headed into the dimly lit establishment.

“Well, you’ve got the looking damn fine part completely down. Witchcraft, Harley. Fucking wizards and shit.” he replied. I giggled at his utter bullshit.

“Don’t sell yourself short, Strider. You wear flannel and jeans very well. Fucking lumberjack majyx and shit.” I shot back, brushing against him as we make our way to the counter. We ordered our tea uneventfully and took a seat on one of the couches. He removed his shades to look me in the eyes, and the action took me aback for a second.

“Sorry..I know they have that kind of effect on people, but we’re getting more intimate and shit, so I want to be completely open, and-“ I kissed the corner of his mouth mid-sentence.

“Hey. It’s sweet. The most I ask for at this point is that you don’t be late, and you’ve done that. Okay?”

“Uhm, yeah. Yeah. That’s really cool of you, Harley.” he stuttered, slipping an arm around my shoulder. I tried not to smile too much, what with my still painfully awkward buck teeth. He’s just too perfect.

Our tea came and we didn’t talk for a while, just sat there and enjoyed each others’ company. I leant into the crook of his arm. He’s always so warm, but not suffocating. Just light.

“Hey, so you got to hear my adventures a while ago. How’d yours go?” I sighed. Dave nodded curtly.

“You know how I used to live with my Bro, right?” I gestured for him to continue.

“He taught Dirk and I to fight, but he didn’t know when to stop. He physically abused us. Dirk wore long sleeves every day to school. I covered it up with makeup. When Dirk came out as gay and me as bi, he kicked us out. We snuck back in to get what little stuff we could, and he nearly killed Dirk. That’s when we sought out the Lalondes, our cousins.  
Doctor Roxy and Doctor Rose took us in, helping us make the trip to their home in Paradise. I got a degree in criminology, and Dirk followed me. The police department wouldn’t take us because of our eyes, so we started our own practice as private investigators. Jane broke away from the influence of HIC, becoming a PI as well to put a stop to her adoptive mother’s schemes.  
I'd meddled with time to give myself I leg up against my Bro, and the powers I was able to find stayed in my mind. They made themselves useful in figuring out different cases. I peeked into an entirely different parallel timeline, there you and I were…best friends, and I knew I had to find you again. When I did, we were in opposing aisles, but just being around you made my heart sprint for miles-"

“What?”

“I started rhyming. For whatever reason I do that when I get to telling stories."

“Maybe you could’ve been a rapper."

“Ha yeah. I might have been at one point,” he mumbled, running a hand through his hair. “Anyways, I’ve been meaning to ask who those sex worker girls were that raised you."

“Nepeta Leijon."

“I knew her. She had to drop out of college to support her family the way her mother did.” I paused at this, but continued.

“Vriska Serket.”

“Didn’t you take down her mother and older sister once?"

“Best job I ever did.” I replied with a smirk. “Aradia Megido. Her mom and sister worked for English. I was able to get them out from under his thumb."

“So you do have a heart somewhere in there."

“Shuddup. I don’t kick a person when they’re down."

“Respectable."

“Feferi Peixes."

“Mom threw her out on the streets because she was afraid she would take over her empire."

“Another reason HIC needed to die,” I muttered. “Kanaya Maryam."

“Rose’s girlfriend?"

“She was the best mom-friend anyone could ever have. I’m so glad she was able to make a better life for herself.”  
Dave chuckled a little bit at this. I glanced at him questioningly.  
“It’s just that you care about so many people enough to kill for them.” he commented.

“Latula Pyrope. Died of heroine addiction.” The air grew tense. “Terezi Pyrope. Died seeking to exact justice upon Lord English. She was…my first girlfriend.”

“I went in with her that day to fight Lord English.” My eyes grew wide at his words. “She put up an amazing fight, but he’s a beast. I was at least able to grab her body and get her to a hospital.”

“I remember you at the hospital just before I went in to talk to her. She told me to finish what she started. She knew that I had it in me."

“She would be so proud of you. Her mother nearly died trying to kill Mama Serket.” Another brief pause.

“Wow. That’s a hell of a subject.”

“Haha. Well, I guess I brought it up. So…what do you do in your free time? We haven’t talked much about what you picked up after all your history happened."

“I, uh, I still garden. I still play the bass. I go drinking and dancing if it’s been an especially bad night. What about you?”

“I make electronic music. I sometimes work on photography, but it’s more just an ironic thing. I make this web comic called Sweet Bro and Hella Jeff. I occasionally go drinking and dancing if my hours allow it.”

“Dude. You have all the time in the world."

“Yeah, but Mama Pyrope always knows if I’m shirking work.”

“Pyrope sees all.” I giggled. The best thing in the world happened: He joined in. “Hey, so about fighting Lord English with me. You were serious about that?”

“Hell yeah. He’s killed so many people I knew, and knowing that he hurt you too…let’s say that I’m not letting him get away with anything more.”  
I nodded, reaching up to kiss his cheek. My damn phone buzzed. His damn phone buzzed.  
“Sorry, I gotta take this.” We both said.

“Hello?” I answered.

“Jade! Lord English just set the Red Light District on fire. You need to come home and change now.” John replied, the shuffling and clicking of weapons in the background.

“There’s no time. I can get there faster from here. You guys get there as fast as you can and I’ll meet you there.” I hung up, turning to Dave.

“Same call?” he asked.  
“Same call. Can you give me a ride to the Red Light?”  
“Let’s go.”

I followed him to his car, grabbing my trench coat out of my tiny purse.

“How do you have that in your purse, Jade?"  
“Spacey powers."

I zipped and buttoned it up over my sundress, internally transferring my weapons from my dress to my jacket as Dave sped through the streets. I put my hair up into my fedora. I left my purse on the floor of his car.

“Some way to end a date, huh?” he asked. I grinned, loading my pistols.

He parked on the side of the road and I hopped out, running straight towards my old brothel. I had to know that they were alright.

“Jade!” a prim voice yelled.  
“Kanaya!” I ran towards her. Our old building stood ablaze. “Who all’s still inside?”  
She said nothing.  
“Kanaya, answer me.” I ordered.  
She said nothing, jade streaming down her face.  
Shaking her shoulders, I yelled. “Kanaya, are any of them still alive?”

“No,” came Rose’s calm voice. “Lord English killed them all.”  
It felt as if I were choking on air. “No. Are you sure none of them are alive in there?"  
“JADE! Look out!” Dave yelled, running to tackle me out of the way as the brothel collapsed in on itself.

I clenched my jaw, struggling to my feet once more. “Is Lord English still here?”  
Rose closed her eyes for a moment. “Yes. He’s setting another fire about three blocks over.”  
“I’m going to find him."  
“I’m going with you.” Dave interjected.  
“Me too.” Rose added.  
“I shall accompany as well.” Kanaya grumbled.  
“Aaaand here comes my team! Very fucking late,” I sighed, turning with my hands on my hips towards our black Ford.

...

“You guys stopped for Sonic, didn’t you.” Palm to face.  
“It was happy hour.” John muttered.  
“Did you at least get me a slushy?” I seethed.  
“…No.” Jake mumbled.  
“Darlings, I love you, but you’re dumb as hell. Come on. We’re going to go fight Lord English. Lead the way, Rose.” I growled.

We all ran towards the edge of Red Light. I heard speaking around me, but I disconnected from it to focus on the task ahead. I eventually noticed that Roxy, Jane, and Dirk had all arrived and were now running with us. Dirk and Jake were having a disjointed conversation. Lord I hoped it worked out for them at some point. Jake thought that their relationship falling apart was his fault. As soon as I glimpsed his garish overcoat, I ran ahead of Rose, firing and firing and firing.

Dirk and Dave coordinated a soul and time attack. Roxy began absolutely wailing on him with non-sensical void attacks. Rose fired up her Eldritch abilities. Jane stayed to the sidelines, healing those who died from Lord English’s devastating attacks. Jake did the best he could with his fisticuffs and pistols, as he hadn’t quite mastered his hope powers quite yet. He more than made up for it in fighting prowess. Jake knocked Lord English onto his back with brute force. Credit where credit is due. I worked my spacey thing to take this battle outside the city. Jane glanced at me and gave me an appreciative smile. Kanaya absolutely devastated him with her chainsaw. John’s windy thing got Lord English kneeling, but it wouldn’t subdue him.

Roxy set up barricades so that I could shoot protected. Her generic objects could take the brunt of Lord English’s attacks. The fight raged on for at least half an hour. Everyone was so in sync with their attack, it almost seemed like art.

Pain seared through my shoulder, and in a moment, my right arm was gone. After a moment, the adrenaline was so great I couldn’t feel it. Jane healed it to a stub, but she couldn’t bring my arm back. I kept firing and fighting with everything I had.

I couldn’t see everything that was going on, but I saw that Lord English’s head rose into the air, looking like it was about to go off like a bomb. I made right angles with my thumb and index finger, focusing it in my sights. I transported it off to a completely unoccupied point in space. I shielded my eye from the rainbow blast, breathing hard as I leant against the barricade.

Dave hugged me close, patting my back comfortingly. Dirk joined in. Then Jake. Then John. Jane. Roxy and Rose. Kanaya. All just standing there, hugging each other like we just won the Super Bowl. Then over on the horizon, just over the hill, I saw motherfucking Nepeta Leijon. Then Vriska Serket. Aradia Megido. Feferi Peixes.

I broke away from everyone else, running towards them in desperation. And they were real. They were really real. I started crying because I was so filled with joy.

“They, uh, weren’t in the building…” Rose mumbled.

“Wow. It’s like looking in a mirror. Don’t worry. I know a great mechanic.” Vriska mused.  
“How are you guys alive?” I whimpered.  
“Feferi got our bodies out and healed us.” Nepeta answered, snuggling me tightly.  
“God I missed you guys. You know what? You guys can come live at my house. There’s plenty of room.” I decided.  
“I have always wanted to go back to school for paleontology.” Aradia pondered.  
I glanced back at Dave. “Excuse me for a moment, ladies.”

“So…I guess it’s done. My vendetta has been fulfilled.” I sighed.  
“What does this mean now? Are you gonna try to clean your name?” he suggested.  
“There’s always going to be another big bad guy or gal. Sometimes I’ll have to dip outside the boundaries of the law. It won’t be easy, but I think I want to try having a better life.”  
“And your team?” He gestured to them. Dirk and Jake were awkwardly talking things out. John and Karkat were chatting with Roxy and Jane.  
“They’ll follow me to hell and back. In fact, they already did today. I want them to be able to grow old someday. John and Karkat will grow old together, just gotta keep them clean. The jury's still out on Dirk and Jake, but I’m hoping they make it. Roxy and Jane have almost always chosen the law, so they’ll be alright. Kanaya has her life right with Rose. So that leaves me atoning for my sins.”  
“Roxy can hack the database and clear you of your charges.” Dave answered.  
“Isn’t that the illegal way of making me a lawful citizen?” I giggled.  
“Hey. For you, it’s worth it.” I blushed a little bit. I leaned over to kiss him, and he kissed me back, wrapping his arms around me comfortably.  
For once, I didn’t have to worry about if I needed to break away for something else. I could just stay.


	4. Here we go.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This serves as the epilogue for this portion.

About four months later, Dave and Dirk stood on my doorstep with three suitcases and a set of turntables. I stepped to the side to let them through. My sisters, brother, cousin, and friend sat crowded around the TV. The latter three got up to come help them with their bags.

“Good lord I still can’t believe you guys are moving in. Hmmm. Karkat. Dave. You know where my room is. Jake, take Dirk’s stuff up to your room. John the turntables can go on the long table behind the couch.” I planned out loud.  
“God I love you.” A gasp and squeal emitted from the area by the couch.  
“He finally said it!” John and Nepeta squeaked.  
“Just because I haven’t killed you guys yet doesn’t mean I won’t.” I yelled. The two of them being friends gave me such a headache.  
Dave came up behind me and lifted me into a hug by my waist.  
“Yes. I know. You finally got taller than me. You don’t have to brag about it every time.” I growled, kicking my feet.  
“You’re too adorable. I’m sorry. It’s fucking magic.” he answered, carrying me to my room.  
I submitted and went limp instead. He laid me down on my bed, hugging me and kissing along my jaw and neck.  
“Stop! It tickles!” I screeched, struggling to get away.  
“Not a chance, baby.”

I screamed, kicking straight to his shoulders. I rolled into a ball, covering my eyes with my hands. I couldn’t believe I was doing this again, but Dualscar seemed very much alive in my mind, the one place I never wanted him to be again. I could still feel those calloused hands on my cheek, pulling me to him as I said no. No. No. No! No! No! NO!  
“Jade? Jade!” Dave yelled. His shades clattered to the floor. “Jade, it’s me, dollface.”  
I looked up at him. “Sorry. You just sounded like-“ I broke down into sobbing.  
“Shhh, shhh, Jade. It’s okay. I’ve got you.” Dave formed a ball around me. I synchronized my breathing with his heartbeat.  
“Thanks, Dave. Just please don’t call me baby.” I mumbled.  
“No problem…Is something burning?” he asked, sniffing the air.  
“Shit!” I hopped out of my bed, carrying him along with me. I dropped Dave to his feet at the kitchen, opening the oven. Grey smoke poured into the house. I coughed, grabbing the fire extinguisher and dousing it in white foam.

“Weeeeeeeell there goes dinner tonight.” Vriska sighed.  
“God damn flashbacks. Now my arm’s on the fritz.” I grumbled, leaning against the fridge on my flesh arm. I glanced over at Dave, a smile coming to my face.  
“Extra large-“ he began.  
“Bacon-wrapped-“ I continued.  
“Stuffed crust-“ Him.  
“Order-in-“ Me.  
“Pizza!” Everyone in the goddamn house.

About an hour later, we were all on the couches enjoying our pizza.  
“Jade?” Dave asked.  
“Mmhm?” I say through a mouth of cheese.  
“Do those flashbacks happen often?” he continued.  
“I can answer that. Yes,” Jake offered from his place on Dirk’s lap, who was in turn in the recliner.  
“She’s been having nightmares since she broke the big guy’s arm,” John added.  
“Jade, you could have told me-“ Dave started.  
“She didn’t want to, dumbass,” Karkat interjected.  
“She doesn’t like anyone having to take care of her anymore,” Feferi glubbed.  
“Not when she fought so hard for herself and her friends,” Aradia chimed in.  
“It makes her feel weak to not be able to handle things herself,” Vriska joined.  
“And coming to you fur help would just affurm her worries about being too weak to fight anymore.” Nepeta yowled.  
“Hey. She’s a lot like me.” Dirk finished.

I couldn’t help but giggle. “You guys know me so well."  
“Only because we have to pick up the slack for Dave being a bit oblivious,” Rose called back from the open door.  
“I resent that,” Dave muttered.  
“But it’s true,” Kanaya countered.  
“Not entirely unfounded,” Jane sighed.

“Why do I have so many friends?” I asked.  
“You’re worth the trouble.” Dave answered, tightening his arms around me.  
“Just like I said, you two are too cute!” Roxy yelled from behind Kanaya, Rose, and Jane.

“Okay, why is everyone here?” Jake growled. Dirk pushed him off of his lap. “Strider! The hell was that for?” he cursed, getting to his feet. Just as Dirk got down on one knee.  
“Jake…we’ve, uh, been through so much together. You know me better than anyone else in the world. I have no idea how I survived without you in my life. All this to say…Jake,” He took off his shades, “will you marry me?”  
Jake tackle-hugged Dirk back onto the floor. “Yes! Of course I will, you cheeky bastard.”

I looked up at Dave. “Time to pay up, buddy.”  
“You two were betting on this, Jade?” Jake asked incredulously.  
“Hey, I knew you’d make it,” I replied, shrugging my shoulders.  
“I thought Jake’d say no,” Dave added.  
“Like I said. Fifty bucks, Strider. Pay up,” I ordered playfully.  
“Can I pay you in se-"  
“No.”  
“I’m surprised,” Vriska interjected.  
“Calm down, frisky Vrisky. You’ll hear it later,” I said.  
“Yeah. Dave’s loud af,” Dirk proclaimed, wrestling with his fiancé.  
Dave turned red.  
“Oh my god! I don’t think I’ve ever gotten him to blush that red before. My hat off to you, Dirk,” I yelled victoriously. He hid his eyes in my shoulder in embarrassment. I pet his head comfortingly. “Yes, yes, Dave. I know.”

Next thing I know, Dave bridal-style carried me back to my room.  
“Shit! Jade down! Jade down!” I shouted over his shoulder.  
“Get some, nerd!” Roxy encourages with a double thumbs up.  
“Oh I will,” I answered with a wink.

“I guess this is my life now,” I thought, “Time for an even grander adventure.”  
And with that last thought, Dave closer the door and slammed me up against it. Here we go.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I promise there will be a third part at some point. It's just not happening right now.


End file.
